Ikedon Academy

[nshansen]

Welcome to the RP Academy, ikedon. I'm nshansen and I shall be your Instructor for this session.

Here is how this will work:

I would like for you to post to this thread as if posting a new RP thread. I will then see what it is that you can improve on and point them out to you, as well as replying.

Please understand that this is, by no means, a way to say that your skills are lacking, or that you have been singled out; it is merely a means to assist your growth as a writer and a roleplayer. We all have things to learn from each other; just as I have things I would like to teach you, I'm sure that there's also things that I can learn from you~

The rules are as as follows:

•Respect the site rules. Which means no powerplaying/godmodding other people's characters. I and others don't really care for that type of behavior D:

• Listen to advice. I cannot teach one who will not learn.

• Feel free to disagree If you have issue with something I said, please feel free to point it out. This is a group effort. That said, should you do so, provide reasoning and your alternative views in a calm, rational, and non-confrontational manner, I will treat you with respect, and expect the same treatment in return.

• Have fun. This is a game; furthermore, this is out of plot (unless you later choose to add this into continuity) roleplay. Anything that does not conflict with the rules goes; and that said, we have a little more leeway here. Namely, the location, situation, and anything else are up in the air. If you want to try out something, feel free to do so.

With that said, please allow us to begin!

[Mr. Durp]

Asis was sitting atop a house top waiting for something to happen. Under his eyes there was nothing.
"Why the hell won't some shit happen!" Asis yelled and he jumped off the room on to the dirt road. He starts to walk... nothing... nothing... nothi.....
"What the shit is that, for God's sake why now!!!"

[nshansen]

Okay, Ikedon. This color will tell you if I'm OOC or not, k? First thing, you are switching between your tenses. This site is in third person past tense. Remember to explain to me what he thinks. You arn't the camera, you are him. Lets see what happens now.

Infront of Asis, was a huge large body. The large body hadn't noticed the yelling, so it was suprised that a human came. The first thing in his mind was, "Attack". The large body swung both of his arms widely, hoping to hit the target.

[Mr. Durp]

Asis dodged most of the strong blows. He was mortally wounded. 'Come on, come on, think!' Asis thought to himself for a moment. 'Thats right, the side!'

[nshansen]

Your skipping time. Thats a bad thing. Tell me what he does. A dodge roll? Jump? Make your posts longer, with actions. Don't just say something, try your attack. See if it works.

The large body decided to use another attack, charge. It stopped swinging its arms and started to charge. His feet, brushing the floor hard, waiting for the right time. Then, instantly the large body charged, stomach first.

[Mr. Durp]

When the large body charged him Asis rolled to the side, stood up and jumped towards the enemy. Asis mumbled some words that didn't make sense. Then a dark purple mist arose from his sword and he swung at the large body's rib cage. A huge cut down the side of it. 'It's like it didn't do anything!' Asis said surrprisingly.

[nshansen]

Better.

Sadly, the attack was reflected and Asis stumbled backwards. You should never attack a large body in the front. The large body was suprised that he didn't attack the back first. Oh well.

What Asis didn't realize was the Barrier master floating around them, dancing in the air. It would reflect every attack on his fellow ally, the large body.

Two more heartless popped up. Two heartless soldiers have entered the battle.

[Mr. Durp]

'Ah come on these little guys are fast' Asis thought as he started running towards the two soldiers. He stopted in front of one.
"See yah!" Asis said as he took his sword and entered it through the soldier, pulled up and gone. The heartless had died.
"Now number two"said Asis. He sliced the other in half.
"Way to easy", but at that moment the large body charged him again. Asis had to roll off to the side which the Barrier master was floating. He got up and entered his sword into the bottom of the barrier master, dead.

[nshansen]

The barrier master instantly used his instincts and sat on it's book, giving it another chance to live. The Barrier Master instantly took it's book and wacked Asis's sword to the ground. The next attack, he swung at his face. The large body charged again, this time heading towards Asis's back.

[Mr. Durp]

The large body knocked him back several feet. Asis was knocked out.

[nshansen]

(Okay, um... You're kinda powerplaying me, cause I'm role playing as the heartless. Not you.)

The Barrier Master stopped the large body from charging, thinking the boy was dead. To dispose of the human, it summoned two Wyverns. The barrier master's eyes squinted at the "dead" human. It then turned around and pointed at the boy. The wyverns obeyed orders and flew over to him. One of them grabbed his right shoulder, while the other one grabbed his left one. Their claws, gushing out the blood as they started to fly. This boy was in danger, good. The barrier master then summoned a Dustflier, but this heartless didn't need orders... It already knew what to do. He flew upwards like a torpedo at the helpless boy. The kid wouldn't wouldn't survive this one.

[Mr. Durp]

Asis was out as the wyverns took him away. He woke with mortal wounds on his shoulders.

[nshansen]

(Please modify that and make it longer. Please explain to me how he feels, thinks, whats inside his head as he is passed out.)

[David Bowie]

...? Has class been dismissed? Am I going to have to spam the student with emails to get him to come back?

[nshansen]

Ah... I didn't see that you posted in this, Xahnel. Um... I wouldn't spam him, but probably would pm him, telling him to either post or lose rp privileges.

[David Bowie]

I think he may have left the website...

[nshansen]

he logged in a week ago, so I would give him another week

[Mr. Durp]

His awakening caused him more pain, it seemed to rush through-out his body. Another anger, another sense, another... fear.
Asis was as angry as anyone could imagine. His ager took away the effects of pain, and seemed to bless him with strength.
"Lets go you bitch," he said knowingly to kill the creature. He took his fist and jabbed it into the body. Asis stood in shock as his enemy hit the ground.
"Wha-what is this new power?" he exclaimed. Asis couldn'd resist, he had to, he must kill.
Asis through his sword to the ground. Nothing in-hand but his fists. He ran towards the creature whitch had stood up now. He fought realesing all his energy into his hands. Asis knew, he knew he could win.

[Mr. Durp]

*Hows that? I think its good*

[Mr. Durp]

Sorry, sorry I messed up. Will you tell me what the enemy is, cause I can'r remember.